Ask Dom

Welcome back To Ask Dom,  I'm Dom. Duh. 

Anyway,  I received quite a few excellent questions this week, so let's get started, and remember, if you would like your question featured please email me at AskDom@MilagroSpeaks.com

Our first reader asks:
Is it inappropriate to buy your own engagement ring if your partner can't afford it due to hefty child support payments? 

Um....yes. That question almost depressed me, but I took a breath and remembered that I'm currently sitting a five star hotel room, and my only concern in life is that I cannot smoke in here (I know,  right?). An engagement ring is a token of devotion. I get that your boyfriend has a bunch of kids (that's the worst!), but that doesn't excuse him from pretty much the one obligation he has to ensure a wedding happens. Understanding he doesn't have a lot of dough right now, accept a simple band, and if anyone judges that ring, remind the married ones that their diamonds are probably soaked In African blood, and the single ones that they are going to be alone forever. Who needs money when you have love... and debt?

Our next reader writes:
Is 32 years old too old to get a boob job? 

Hell no!  Generally I try to advocate body acceptance, but if your tits have that dried up concave look,  and you have the means to relive your teen years, go for it. The only person that would question your decision is either a naturalist, or poor, and who cares what they think?  Am I right?

One darling writes:
Where do you get your smarts from? 

First, flattery always works with me. So congratulations, you just won best question. Honestly though, I'm quite terrible at a lot of things.  Here are some examples:  Math, directions, assembling ANYTHING, remembering to use the correct words when I speak,  etc.

Our last question:
I just found out that my daughter has Tourettes, does that mean I have to stop laughing when my childhood friend,  with the same condition, yells "Big fucking tits!"?

I would like to start by saying that your friend clearly knows how to party. To answer your question,  I hate to stifle what is obviously going to be hilarious, but yeaaahh...you should probably stop. As the daughter of  a woman who mainly has negative things to say about me,  I can tell you it sucks to be laughed at by your own mother. Had I been born with a better body, I probably would have been a stripper. So comedy writer it is!  However, if you can't help but laugh,  take solace in knowing there is probably a niche in the stripping industry for Tourettes. So hey, either way!

Comedian Dominique Parr was born on a dirty bed in the Bronx (In all actuality, she was born in a moderately clean hospital in San Diego CA, as clean as they could get it in the 80’s anyway.). She currently resides in Seattle WA with her dog Coolbreeze, and her vast collection of Doctor Who memorabilia. Dominique is the creator of  the Useless Conversations webcomics series currently posted on DomTheMod.com.

Ask Dom

Welcome to the first edition of Ask Dom. A place to ask any question, with the understanding that Dom's answers are probably not condoned by any psychologists, or dictated by common sense. If you would like your question featured on Ask Dom, please email Dom at AskDom@Milagrospeaks.com.

First,  I'd like to introduce you to my friend Dom! 

 

Dominique Parr was born on a dirty bed in the Bronx (In all actuality, she was born in a moderately clean hospital in San Diego CA, as clean as they could get it in the 80’s anyway.). She currently resides in Seattle WA with her dog Coolbreeze, and her vast collection of Doctor Who memorabilia. Dominique is the creator of  the Useless Conversations webcomics series currently posted on DomTheMod.com.



Our first reader writes: How do I win back my boyfriend of 15 yrs?

Wow. Well, I would probably need to know a little bit more about the situation to answer this question. However, if you held that down for fifteen years, you are obviously capable of a long lasting relationship. 

I think the real question is, who is boyfriend and girlfriend for 15 damn years? A guy that refuses to commit, and a broad that won’t let go; that’s who. Don’t waste your sexy years on a guy that isn’t interested in buying the farm, focus the time you have left with dewy skin and good hair on someone worth while. Otherwise, you will look back with regret.

How should I respond to a guy who wants to get married on the first date?

If he expects you to react with anything more than nervous laughter or just saying “I have to go away from you now.” And abruptly leaving, he is crazier than you thought. He is either scary impulsive, or he has a shrine made out of hair collected from your brush. 

I dated a guy who asked me to be his girlfriend the first time we kissed, and you know what? That was a mistake. He broke up with me a few weeks later at a laser show. The point is, you WANT someone to know you long enough to want to be with you. Otherwise it is all based on petty things like looks, or in his case, possible insanity.

Why is the new season of It’s Always Sunny weird?

I think it’s on par with the way that it has always been.

What should I do if a guy says “Let’s have sex, YOLO.”?

Jesus. Just run. You only live once, and you only contract aids once. Why doesn’t he just roll over, expose himself, and grunt? That would equate to the same amount of romantic effort as lets say, using some grimy MTV catchphrase. Respect yourself. 

See you here next week,

-Dom

Cheap eyes

As most of you know I’ve recently come to an understanding with myself to not buy cheap shit.

So I shocked myself when my eyes were drawn to Maybelline New York’s Volum Express The Falsies Flared.

In the past few months I have become such a mascara maniac. I love putting it on, I love curling my eyelashes and I love growing them to great lengths.  

I was concerned at why I was so attracted to this bottle of mascara, and I should mentions that it has a beautiful set of what looks like wings on the front. I didn’t think twice though as I place the product in my cart, came home and placed it next to my other make-up treasures.

To my surprise this purple bottle of mascara that I purchased for $5.94 has changed my eyelash life. This mascara comes with a patented spoon brush and instantly my lashes looked fuller, longer and soo amazing.  

Currently I have yet to have any flaking. This mascara is also contact lens safe. This mascara applies evenly, adds major volume and length. 

         mascara                                         no mascara

I’m not one to do my make-up in public or outside of the comfort of my own home because I’m pretty obsessive compulsive about it, so I enjoyed that this mascara lasted all day and through the evening.

I purchased the very black and yes it’s crazy black. The only negative part is that it’s hard to get off but I’ve found that using Neutrogena night calming makeup remover cleansing towelettes work excellent!

I recommend holding the brush with spoon side against lashes and sweeping from root to tip, and repeat until you’re late for work or wherever you are going. Also do not let your lashes dry between coats.

I have pretty long eyelashes already so this formula was a great enhancement. I’m curious to see how it works with people who have shorter eyelashes anyone want to try and let me know?

So maybe it’s true what people say  “Cheap shit ain’t bad” wait..... no one ever says that!

Consistently Beautiful

My hair is crazy thick and often terrible to comb if I don’t use conditioner. Finding a good conditioner is one of the most difficult things for a person that wants good shinny hair.

In the past few years I have maintained a mindset of “expensive = good shit” that is absolutely not the case when it comes to conditioner.

The conditioner I have grown to love is “Finesse” now this was not an easy decision, I had to go through a lot of conditioners to find my one true love.

I first tried Finesse after I received a free sample in the mail, and then wrote the company about how much I liked their product and then they so kindly sent me a coupon for a free bottle, based on their customer service I knew we were in for a long relationship.

A few things that sold me on my first impression because I often judge a book by its cover…

1.     The bottle is a nice calm blue.
2.     The word “Moisturizing” is in big pink letters.
3.     The bottle says “for Consistently Beautiful Hair”

Yep, they had me at “Consistently Beautiful” my exact personal description! It’s perfect for me. Finesse also doesn’t have a crazy overbearing smell. Often I have used conditioners that I can smell throughout the day that will eventually gives me a huge headache.

The smell has no personal attachment for me; this is huge when picking a good shampoo or conditioner. For example a person that I hate with my every being uses head & shoulders. Now every time I smell head & shoulders, it makes me think of him and I want to vomit.

Back to Finesse, The conditioner is extremely thick it’s like I can feel my scalp quickly absorbing it and my hair is left feeling like beautiful silk.

Finesse has 3 different hair care lines:
Self-Adjusting for Consistently Beautiful Hair
Clean + Simple for sensitive skin (it’s certified hypoallergenic)
Color Lock for colored hair obvs.

I’m more of a Self Adjusting kinda girl of course.

Okay and to top it off I fell in love with Finesse even before I knew Kim Kardashian used it.  Bible.  (Maybe it is true Kim Kardashian and I were meant to be BFF’s)

Also Finesse is SUPER CHEAP, I often get it on sale for 2/$7 and you can stock up when you have coupons.

What conditioner do you use? What are your rules when picking out a hair care product?

Running for Spinal Bifida

Today I had the pleasure of cheering for Mr. Gammon-Reese as he ran and pushed over 100lbs in the Bellingham bay half marathon.

Here are a few reasons why I would NOT want to run a half marathon…

1.     Do you know how long a half marathon is? 13.1094 mile of running!  Also you’re not even running to save your life; it’s just for fun!
2.     I would get so hot and tired after 13 miles of running by the last  .1094 miles I would probably just lay down.
3.     I smelt so many stinky people after the race, it was cray cray!

This was Mr. Gammon-Reese’s 2nd year doing the race. Why did he do it? To raise money for the Spinal Bifida Association, 2 of the 16 Reese children have Spinal Bifida and they proudly rode in their stroller as their dad pushed them.

If you would like to learn more about how you can donate to the Spinal Bifida Association. Check out the Gammon-Reese family blog.

The kids were really tired after all of the treats they ate during the race.

My Everyday Heart Attack

Almost everyday I have a mini heart attack because I can't find my cell phone in my purse.  

Can you relate?

I love purses, particularly Coach purses. I currently own nine Coaches’ but currently my daily Coach is a Kyra Nylon Signature Messenger Bag.

Beautiful, isn't it?

Why do I love it so much?  I can put everything in it! This is really good and can be really stressful at times. I did a quick analysis of what is exactly in my purse. Here we go…

1.     Mitchum deodorant. My friend introduced me to Mitchum about 1 year ago and I’m so glad she did it’s the best deodorant ever! It lasts for hours and leaves such a fresh feeling. 

2.     Medicine and supplements. Sadly my little coach medicine box cannot hold everything = ( I currently am addicted to Xyngular‘s IGNITE 8 day cleanse (ask me more about it) and GNC’s women’s active and “Be Hot” supplements.  

3.     My work badge and a hello kitty headband.

4.     Coach SOHO wallet.

5.     Coach Kisslock Coin Purse 

6.     Cell phone charger. You should always be ready and know where a plug-in is.

7.     M.A.C Bronzer with brush

8.     Rimmel lip gloss

9.     Jell-O cups, I love Jell-O but only strawberry or cherry. I have these in case I get hungry and there is no food in sight. I just realized I don’t have a spoon; I need to get a spoon in my purse ASAP. I like both Watermelon and Grape.

10.    New Whey liquid protein. It’s not the most D-lish but it makes me less hungry throughout             the day IF I drink it. Also, it has an amazing 42g of protein in one drink! Totally cray.

11.     Glasses and glasses case. Just in case my contacts take a turn for the worst.

12.     A nail file that I got for FREE from the doctor’s office.

13.     A Flip Camera because you never know what you might see.

14.     A plastic doggy bag. These have come in handy for so many other things besides picking up         dog shit.

15.     Fifty Shades of Darker, I’ve had the hardest time trying to find time to read it.

16.     My HTC One S cell phone.

So after going through this, half of this shit is useless! However, I’m paranoid and you never know what could happen during my everyday adventures.  

For example one time I saw a crazy gang fight downtown and filmed it all on my flip camera, honestly I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have these items at my finger tips at all times.

So what do you have in your purse? 

Please comment below or even better take a picture, send it to me at Milagrospeaks@gmail.com and I’ll post it!